Hi'ya, Mushie!

Bush is taking heat today for not personally calling & talking to his good friend, Musharref, about the State of Emergency declared in Pakistan. I, for one, am glad he has not. Otherwise, CNN might have to report this conversation:

Bush: Hi'ya Mushie, how's it going?
Mush: Great! We are having wonderful success in controlling our terrorists.
Bush: Fantastic! which terrariss exactly are ya controlling?
Mush: So far, we are having best luck with students, activist groups, journalists, attorneys & judges, and vocal members of the opposition party & their familes.
Bush: hmmm, those are surely bad terrariss. What methods ya using?
Mush: We have removed them from society so they will not pollute our patriotic citizenry.

Bush: How ya gonna keep the patriotic citzenry from contamination by any sneaky terrariss you have not removed yet?
Mush: We have shut down all forms of mass communication, such as telephones, TV, radio, newspapers, graffiti & the internet.
Bush: Let me know how that internets thang goes down. Hey, what about satellite dishes, sneaky terrariss will surely use those to broadcast their messages of unpatriotic hate.
Mush: Good point -- today we have outlawed satellite dishes.

Bush: Well, it seems like ya done a heckuva job there, Mushie!
Mush: Thank you, Mr. Bush, Pakistan is feeling so much more secure now. Why, I have not heard one disparaging remark about myself since declaring a State of Emergency.
Bush: Darnit, I sure do wish I had me some of those State of Emergency powers. Oh, almost fergot! Condi wanted me to ask you to remove your uniform.
Mush: If I remove my uniform for anyone, it will be for Condi.
Bush: Awww, she'll be so pleased to hear that.
Mush: Well Mr. Bush, I am seeing some terrariss, errr terrorists, needing my controlling right now, so I'd better go ...

Bush: Wait, wait! Cheney wanted me to ask, how'd ya like to come over here & help me control my terrariss, after you're all done controlling your own, of course?
Mush: Would I be able to keep my uniform?
Bush: Mushman, you are one tough negosheeator! I'll have to ask Big Dick & get back to ya. He's the only one who can override Condi since he works outside the executive branch. Maybe they can figure out a diplomatic shared uniform arrangement. Meanwhile, you jest let me know if them terrariss you're controlling begin overflowing your jail accomodations. We got some Black Site Detention Centers just begging for a little controlling experience.
Mush: I don't think that will be necessary. We have plenty of soccer stadiums at our disposal....

Pakistan Locked Down

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