Wednesday, February 27, 2008

The Girl Can't Help It

Sorry, I'm just in a wierd mood today ... or maybe just silly (to wit, Mozart laughing & Vivaldi opera on the post below).

I don't like to pick on a woman who has admitted she lacks Fashion-DNA. The fact that I spend half my life in sweat shorts and t-shirts should probably prohibit me from even speaking about fashion. I don't expect the woman running for the highest office in the land (maybe even in the world?) to be wasting precious brain-time on her clothing. What I do expect is that she has a staff of people who are experts in this field and who are well aware that how she dresses in public will be scruntinized ... by the likes of me and many others who are wondering ... WHAT IS UP WITH HILLARY's CLOTHES?

After being treated day after day to a series of terrible color choices and figure unfriendly pantsuits and unfortunate jewelry, I can only conclude that Hillary Clinton's personal staff hates her. In fact, I'm begining to suspect that her own staff is purposefully sabotaging her public appearances. How else to interpret the old-lady pearls (when she already has a problem connecting with young people) and the solid unflattering colors (mustard yellow, fire engine red, pumpkin orange, naval academy blue, shit-brown)?

Now her solid black pants, in and of themselves, are not a bad fashion choice. It is the designer short jackets that are killing her. Let's face it, the woman needs a longer more boxy tunic-style jacket. Something that drapes far below the hip-line. And either the jacket or the blouse could be patterned with something interesting, not always a solid color.

And so it was that I found myself last night waiting to see what Hillary would wear to this important debate. What would properly reflect her foundering campaign ship, expose her vaunted tested/ready experience, and reveal her exasperation with this young upstart, this "how-dare-he-derail-my-annointed-position" Obama?

I'm sorry to report that she chose a shit-brown short lumpy chunky tweed jacket. Apparently her staff failed to tell her that this color looks awful with her skin & hair, that the cut is all wrong for her body type, and that those little pearls should be trashed or used to decorate her dining chandelier, not her neck. I realize how picky this sounds ... well as I said, I'm an amateur in a wierd mood today. But I do believe the choice of shit-brown set the tone for the rest of her debate performance. If you saw it, or any of the endless snippets shown on cable TV today, you know what I mean.

At this rate, I half-way expect her to show up in something like this for her next public rally:

A model wears a creation by Belgian fashion designer Martin Margiela for his Fall-Winter 2008-2009 ready-to-wear collection presented in Paris, 2-25-08.

Is that a cat bed around her neck? Hey, at least with this kind of outfit, Hillary could ditch the pearls! ps, if you want to see pix of the kinds of winter outfits I think would've done well for Hillary, click here. Not the skimpy dresses (my gawd, the thought of that), the long draping below-the-hip stuff. See the creamy mustard number starting at :42 that blows away Hillary's bright mustard yellow pantsuit. She needs Calvin Klein! For that matter, so do I ...


Fran said...

Bwa ha ha!!!! The mustard yellow color (on anybody-- not just HC) just about makes me want to wretch. It just offends my senses for some reason. Come to find out it is her favorite color! She'd almost be safer getting a man's suit- going for the traditional black or blue suit with the red power tie.

Regardless of fashion (non)sense~ Texas & Ohio could bring the primary circus to a halting stop, should they not give Hill enough votes/delegates to be viable.

On one hand I wish I could have my opportunity to vote & use our extra delegates for having a later primary.... but the whole thing has been a disconnect for me. Could not watch the primaries on public airwaves, and maybe now not even get to vote because the decision had been made by others.
That's OK if the decision jives with my vote, but if it were reversed, I'd feel even more disenfranchised from the alleged democratic process.

Makes me feel as uneasy as when I see that mustard color yellow.

D.K. Raed said...

Mustard yellow is high on my list of irritants, too. Also fuchsia pink & day-glo orange, both of which Clinton has worn as accessories. I dunno ... maybe I'm being too hard on her ... maybe she really does pick out her own clothes off the rack ... something just rings false about that to me. It's almost as if she is pandering for the avg mall-shopper vote. You know it's bad when even *I* notice it because I usually don't give a fig for what people wear.

I have seen her in a nice royal blue outfit that had a looser fitting jacket, and also a black square-necked nehru-type jacket over an emerald green silk blouse that looked good on her. Men have it so much easier in this regard, all they have to decide is which tie.

Unless she bows out (something I do NOT think she will do) or a whole lot more superdelegates start committing, I have a feeling you may get your chance to make a difference in your May primary!

enigma4ever said...

I saw on her plane the press made a Pantsuit Schedule and posted it....nothing was said that she saw any humor in it....( she calls her Colonel Mustard Outfit "Sunshine Yellow for Sundays" per the schedule)......and my Ex pointed out that ALL of her outfits look like Hertz Renta Car upholperstory....( sp)
and I am sooooo sick of pantsuits....I don't care if they are Prada or Vera Wang....and WHO chooses these? are they her choice? after how girlish and petty she has conducted herself I don't feel bad making fun....not at all....

and you got it right- once I saw that dogshit brown I KNEW we were in for more antics...

D.K. Raed said...

hmmm, Hertz Renta-Wreck or a Big Yellow Taxi? When she wears that freakin "Sunshine Yellow", she might as well plaster a "caution: wide load" sign on her behind.

I do think a real designer (like Vera Wang) would not give her those short jackets that flare out right where she doesn't need any extra flare. I think this is why the recent debates have all been in sit-down mode. First, that minimizes the height diff between her & Obama, and second, it precludes the stray rear-cam shot that destroys america's ability to concentrate.

Thanks for helping me pick on her. It's really up to us women to provide this service, huh?

Fran said...

Have to send you this link to a funny re Hillary attire:

D.K. Raed said...

Thanks for the fun 'toon, Fran. Good thing I didn't inherit a guilt gene. She is becoming more pathetic and desperate by the day (as reflected by her fashion sense). I laugh while I still can!